MTV long ago abandoned “music” for teen-friendly reality programming, but hits like Laguna Beach and the wildly popular spinoff The Hills rarely show what real young people’s lives are like. The network aims higher with The Paper, a series about an award-winning Florida high school newspaper staffed by editors who are ambitious and melodramatic, fun and funny, cruel and competitive, whip-smart and way dumb. Y’know, like actual teenagers.

The socially awkward centre around which The Paper turns is Amanda Lorber, the Tracy Flick-esque overachiever whose ascension to editor-in-chief finds her jealous classmates in open revolt.

Amanda may have a bright future, but her utter uncoolness (she considers it “quirky”) is distracting to her peers. She overcompensates: gets a nose job, plans her wardrobe a week in advance, cracks corny jokes and hosts an “ice-cream social” when everyone would rather be playing laser tag or longarming beer bongs. With each attempt, she comes off ever lamer to the paper’s cool clique. They believe Amanda thinks she’s better than them — which she probably does… and not entirely without reason — so they mock her mercilessly.

The irony, of course, is that cool is relative. They’re all just journalism geeks to the school’s reigning jocks, and at least Amanda sadly accepts her outcast status. Speaking of which, watch for reality TV’s most dorktastic moment ever when a bespectacled nerd asks Amanda to homecoming… in Latin! (“Estimated translation time: five to 10 minutes.”) 

The series admittedly spends too little time on newsgathering, but you can hardly blame MTV once the staff splinter into feuding factions, with managing editor Alex caught in the middle. Besides, with all the Wii boxing, text messaging, mean girls, house parties and High School Musical… On Ice, even MTV’s storyline-­advancing editing can’t totally mask this revelatory insight into the modern teenage experience.

THE PAPER AIRS MONDAYS, 10:30PM ON MTV CANADA

Making a mountain out of The Hills
If The Paper concerns itself with youth’s cruel realities, The Hills revels in its cruel fantasies. Over three seasons, MTV’s sorta-reality show has become cable’s top-rated series and is so zeitgeist-y that after villainess Heidi Montag endorsed John McCain, the presidential candidate quipped, “I’m honoured to have Heidi’s support, and I want to assure her that I never miss an episode of The Hills.” Not to be outdone, Barack Obama promised on Letterman to end Lauren and Heidi’s feud.  
Yet, you’d never realize The Hills cultural phenomenon status from watching the docu-soap itself.
Since Laguna Beach star Lauren Conrad moved to 90210, The Hills has always ignored the impact of its own cameras. And so nobody believes this is real reality — as Heidi’s lesser-half Spencer Pratt told LA Times, “We’re improv TV personalities.” So who cares if they shoot pickups, loop dialogue, exaggerate reactions or concoct dramatic confrontations, as one of LC’s dates once revealed?

The draw is the catfights that have dominated since ex-BFFs Lauren and Heidi became arch-nemeses over alleged sex-tape rumours. It’s essentially two separate shows now, with hangers-on like LC’s roommate Audrina and Spencer’s sister Stephanie crossing back and forth. (By the way, I’m totally Team Heidi — her boyfriend may be a douchebag but she just seems lonely while Lauren remains judgmental, vindictive and, worst of all, dirt dull.)
But here’s what kills me — The Hills pretends these chicks aren’t famous, choosing not to film the paparazzi flashbulbing them, the fans mobbing them, the magazine covers, talk-show appearances and side projects like Lauren’s clothing line, Heidi’s bikini-clad singing “career” and Audrina’s leaked nudie pics. Not to mention the PR strategy sessions they undoubtedly have off-camera.
With Season 3 now re-airing on CTV and next season launching in August, this is MTV’s chance to make The Hills a defining chronicle of our TMZ times by morphing into a meta-series about gossip-fuelled fame and the self-documenting generation. So long as the girls remain best frenemies, MTV could have its cake and film it, too.  

THE HILLS AIRS SUNDAYS, 7PM ON CTV (7:30PM, BEGINNING JUNE 8).