Pisces (Feb 20-March 20)
Pisces has room to move this week, with a world of receptive and interesting people lingering just near enough to inspire but far enough away not to freak out your gentle constitution. That the matters concerning your happiness most are entirely out of your reach will be almost painless in the face of how pleasant it is to not be crowded by your usual detractors. Like your boyfriend.

Famous Canadian Pisceans born this week:
Kim Campbell (former prime minister, March 10, pictured)
William Lyon Mackenzie (rebel, first mayor of Toronto, March 12)
John Abbott (former prime minister, March 12)

Aries (March 21-April 19)
Overextended Aries, you’re feeling a little behind the eight ball this week. And not an eightball of narcotics — you don’t really need artificial stimulants to exhaust everyone around you, even when you’re sort of rundown. Let nature and failure force you into a little relaxation time over the next few days — frankly, you can use it.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)
If there’s anything you hate, it’s being forced, Taurus. But every now and then, sucking one up for the team (if not the greater good) can be really character-building. Of course, the character you’ve been working on is of chaotic evil alignment, so we’ll see how far that takes you in the workplace.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)
It’s a good thing you roll with the punches, Gemini, because life is going to treat you like the back alley of a bar in Windsor this week. You’ll come out of it on top, of course — especially after submitting all the proper papers to your insurance company — but try to stay out of the crossfire for the rest of the month. You’re only one man.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Do you feel Uranus opening up possibilities for you, Cancer? Assuming the universe is being gentle, this should be a stimulating time for you — laying the groundwork for greatness that will unfold throughout the rest of the year. Remember that when you’re feeling negative and angry and hemmed in by the dirty ice floes that have become the streets around you.

Leo (July 23-Aug 22)
I wouldn’t call you a prostitute exactly, Leo, but it’s all right to be upfront about your desire to exchange, say, favours — minor electrical work or t-shirt printing or hair highlights — for, say, oral sex or even just cuddling. It’s OK — everybody does it. You’re just less subtle about it.

Virgo (Aug 23-Sep 22)
It’s time to realign your interpersonal strategies with as much methodical care as you usually put into re-tagging your MP3s and sanding down shelf-boards. It’s going to be scarier, because actual decisions that involve actual other people will be required of you — but really, you and your happiness will be so much better off.

Libra (Sep 23-Oct 22)
Libra, you are in demand this week like a space heater in a Thunder Bay basement apartment. Characteristically, you will be frustratingly indecisive about those to whom to award your charms, all the way up until the point that you have wasted every chance.

Scorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21)
The whirlwind of sultry personal times and logistical life difficulties provides Scorpio with a wintry mix right about now — but it’s nothing a change of hairstyle and several drinking benders in one week can’t postpone.

Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21)
The new moon of the 7th rattles your cage close to home — but like all good-spirited Sagittarians, you’re able to see past the temporary disruptions into the further-reaching parts of life. Like, at least dinner.

Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19)
Life-shifting is slowly afoot, but most Capricorns haven’t really noticed it yet, being busy fretting and micromanaging and living in denial or whatnot. Luckily, by the middle of the week you should be having so much totally hot sex you will be completely unable to deny that something is going on.

Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 19)
Aquarius has jumped out of the frying pan and into the 20,000-BTU designer barbeque this week, entirely on purpose and entirely successfully. Especially if by success you mean getting coated in a thick, sooty layer of carcinogens.