Daily horoscopes each weekday at www.eyeweekly.com/horoscope!
Aries (March 21-April 19)
Trying to figure out how to ask for a raise in time for your holiday-spending spree? Some combination of work harder, work better or work faster is a definite prerequisite, especially when Christmas bonuses are increasingly becoming a thing of the past. In short: work much and expect little.
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
The only thing standing in your way today is one particularly stubborn human being. There are many tools of persuasion at your disposal and you might need them all: charm, reasoning, bribery and blackmail. Most of all, though, listen to the concerns of your opponent and address those directly. Consider, too, that he might be right.
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
There are limits, you know, especially at work. There's a limit to how many breaks you can and for how long, to how much you can earn, and how much time you have to get things done. There's also a limit to how much bullshit one person can be expected to take — and you're almost there.
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Ah, ye of the gourmet taste and the student's budget. Need to grab some dinner out tonight and automatically think Canoe when you should be thinking falafel? You could split the difference and cook up your own delicacies at home later this week. But for now, the sooner you can fall in love with that falafel idea, the better.
Leo (July 23-Aug 22)
Entertaining for the holidays? I know, the festive spirit of love and giving is the last thing on your mind today. You've got deadlines and sleep deprivation and a whole lot of bitter resentment to keep you company for now. But just in case you were thinking of maybe hosting something next month, you might want to get those invites out sooner than later. Just saying.
Virgo (Aug 23-Sept 22)
Another crap day smack dab in the middle of the week, with nary a weekend in sight. And you've got piles of housework that really cannot wait another day. So it's wake up, work, go home, work, go to bed, wake up and, you guessed it, work. Might I suggest a rocking soundtrack and a pie from the local pizzeria to get you through the night?
Libra (Sept 23-Oct 22)
Your career aspirations are lofty but your current collection of coworkers and colleagues are decidedly mediocre. But, hey, happy birthday to Margaret Atwood, the name in Canadian literature. Look to icons like Atwood for inspiration when everybody else around you is only interested in sliding by.
Scorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21)
Like moths to a flame, so are the crazies in your life attracted to you. Your charm and allure can't be turned on and off, unfortunately, and for every good looking prospect headed your way there's an unhinged loony looking to unload his life story. It's all part of the package, Scorpio, so grin and bear it.
Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21)
When is the last time you had a real night's sleep? And, no, dozing at your desk doesn't count. Coffee can only perk you up, it can't actually make you rested. And I don't know if you heard? But it is, apparently, flu season. If you think it's hard to find the time to sleep, then there's no way you can afford to get sick
Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19)
Purel is the new verb in your life and OCD just might make your best neuroses of the year list. You don't want to get sick and you do want to avoid germs, I know. Just don't get all Howie Mandel and start stocking up on latex gloves because nobody likes that.
Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 19)
It's not as though Prince Charles is going to make a stop at your place on this cross-Canada trip, right, so why bother cleaning the bathroom or picking up your dirty socks or covering your mouth when you burp, right? Wrong. The thing is that you never do know when somebody worthwhile might drop by. What if the doorbell rang right now?
Pisces (Feb 20-March 20)
On a scale of one to 10, how badly do you think you need a Kindle? Of course it would be cool to carry around the world's bookstore in your pocket, but $259 worth of cool? Watching what you spend is going to mean saying no to yourself — especially in the $200-plus department.