I was thinking about applying as a model for an alternative porn website, such as Suicide Girls, but had heard about some controversy concerning them. I was wondering if you could give some suggestions on which companies you prefer and would recommend to an 18-year-old girl who’s comfortable with her sexuality and is in need of some extra cash to pay for school and rent. C

Frankly C, I don’t prefer any indie sites because I like my porn models the old-fashioned way: bleached, tanned and extravagantly pneumatic. Oh, and smiling. If you’re asking me which websites won’t give you all kinds of faux-feminist tripe about being in charge of your image while editing your thoughts if you don’t adhere to their carefully constructed DIY community image, imposing exclusivity contracts without truly adequate financial recompense and threatening lawsuits if you do other work that may compete, under broad definitions, with their company, that’s different.

You’ve all heard the anti-Suicide Girls rumblings by now (you know, that it’s a real business with equally contemptible practices as the mainstream industry it posits itself against), not that it would’ve been hard to predict, regardless of shitty company policies, that a website glorifying the sulky urchin was going to run afoul of the sulky urchins it glorifies. For some of the most up-to-date drama, visit www.apneaticmedia.com. Apnea’s a former SG who now has her own “single girl personality-based” website (www.apneatic.com) and I am learning terminology like “single girl personality-based website” that becomes common parlance partially as a result of ugly lawsuits and infighting: “I invented sullen girls who think they’re sex mavericks.” “No, I invented sullen girls who think they’re sex mavericks.” Everyone shut up. Life invented sullen girls who think they’re sex mavericks; you all just tripped upon an efficient way to make money off the current supply and now you’re all fighting like pimps on a corner. Welcome to alternative porn, where rather than working for The Man, you work for The Boy.

The biggest problem is, C, nowadays there’s no reason not to be naked online if you’re young and skinny and (cough) different, which means you are looking at a severely oversaturated market filled with a lot of girls simply doing it for the attention. None of this is really new to porn, nor are the subsequent accusations of being taken advantage of but, as a start, check out www.indienudes.com, a clearinghouse of alternative-porn sites. I had a chat with Igor, whose site www.drivenby
boredom.com is linked there, and who is considered an expert in alt-porn because, as he claims, he started the first related review site. Igor warns there is little chance of making a living simply doing alt-porn, but suggests that carving your own niche, “even if it’s just a blog with some pictures,” holds the most promise. He says working for multiple sites and making sure they will link to your own (where you should offer free content for a time) is a smart addition to this. And he is adamant that you work with good photographers. I would suggest haunting message boards on craigslist or at the universities that offer photography and look for TFP (time for prints).

Have a peek at www.godsgirls.com and www.burningangel.com. They offer less money per photo set than Suicide Girls, but neither of them demands exclusivity.

 Look for sites that allow you to capitalize on their traffic by linking your personal site to theirs, like the up-and-coming Toronto-based Rock ’n’ Roll Geishas (www.rocknrollgeishas.com). Run by another former SG, Jezebelle, and her partner Keaton, it has ethical ambitions and looks to target the queer market, though they will “happily show our hot cocks and cunts for all the vanilla boys and girls next door, too.” As of yet, they have no flat fee for photo sets but won’t impose exclusive contracts.

Keep your eyes open and don’t believe that “indie” necessarily means “principled.” There are a lot of grubby people in all aspects of the sex trade and one profitable way of galvanizing youth is to offer an option based on false or exaggerated claims about more mainstream industries and playing on their innate desire to be (and belief that they are) unique. A book that might interest you is Naked Ambition, a series of essays by “women who are changing pornography.”

Totally assinine
I’ve been seeing my girlfriend for a few months and recently she asked if I’d be interested in some anal play — my receiving it from her. I said I’d give it a shot and I have found myself enjoying it. But shortly afterwards, she started making little comments (“jokes” she calls them) here and there that she’s turned me gay, etc. I laughed it off at first but she just keeps on going on about it, even starting to making some suggestive remarks about it in front of our friends. As a result, I got really annoyed with her and told her off. She then started calling me homophobic and said that she didn’t think I was “that kind of guy.” The whole thing has really upset me because I don’t think that’s fair at all. Are my actions that wrong? ANAL BANAL

Anal, hand this newspaper to your girlfriend right now. Girlfriend, we do not ask our new boyfriend to try ass play, have him graciously agree to give it a go and subsequently enjoy it, then make homophobic remarks by implying that anal sex is the exclusive province of gay men (and that, moreover, being gay is something worth being teased about), then call him a homophobe himself when he gets ticked off.

Look, I know you’re doing it because you think you’re such a renegade for fucking your boyfriend’s ass and you’re trying to find some way of working it into casual conversation, but just stop it, will you? Everyone is doing anal now; it’s no big deal. Go get yourself a tranny boyfriend if you want something to wow your friends.

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