WHO: Alistair Christl, 34; Tanya Cheex, “timeless”; Loki Mactavish (cat), 2; Sally Rand (cat), 1.

WHAT: Two-bedroom flat above a cafe in the gay village at Church and Carlton. “Love the hookers, hate the crackheads,” says Cheex.

HOW MUCH: $1,000 per month.

HOW LONG: Seven years.

FAVOURITE THING ABOUT YOUR PLACE: “Our 400-square-foot tiki-bar deck and our garden,” says Cheex, a member of local burlesque troupe Skin Tight Outta Sight. “Alistair built the tiki bar. The materials are mostly recycled from the neighbourhood garbage and Dollarama; Chinatown supplied the bamboo. I’ve always wanted a tiki bar and tried to find a secondhand one, so it was nice when Alistair made us one on the cheap! We hire Dano from The Vondrats to make mai tais and zombies while Alistair jams and Skin Tight performs!”