Enough with Mr. and Mrs. Perfect on top of the cake. It was only a few months back that My Mother’s Lesbian Jewish Wiccan Wedding debuted at a tiny Kensington venue during the 2009 Fringe, but this week the culture-meshing musical will say “I do” to a hefty Mirvish run. Co-written by David Hein and his wife Irene Carl Sankoff, the are-you-kidding-me premise is actually based on Hein’s own experiences. To help Mirvish meet the demand for wacky onstage nuptials, we offer a few suggestions for the company’s next trip down the aisle.

My Farewell-Wall-Street Buddhist Baptist Naturalist Wedding
Two former stock traders meet on a post-pink-slip yoga retreat in India. The wedding is a “ties only” affair — but Daddy won’t foot the bill unless it’s in a church. Performances to be staged in a repossessed house.

My Postmodern Non-Linear Mime Wedding
After meeting under a Magritte painting, these artsy smoochers flout wedding dogma by cutting the cake first — wait, did we say cake? We meant “nothing.” The whole ceremony is, of course, in mime.
 
My Late-on-Car-Payment City Hall Burger King Green Card Wedding
She needs $$$. He needs permission to stay in the country. A few staged photos over a Whopper Combo and they’re good to go. We expect song titles like “He Better Pay Me in Cash” and “I Do… I Guess.”

My Caribbean Communist Punk Macrobiotic Ukrainian Orthodox Swinger Wedding
Six best-friends-with-benefits in Cuba, chugging piña coladas out of painted Easter eggs. Tiered lentil cake. Aisle march to the Beastie Boys. Is this a wedding or Spring Break? Performances to include plenty of audience participation.

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